Cambridge for Consent

Website created by Rowan Douglas & Beth Cloughton using

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Visits to Cambridge for Consent


Do not be afraid to cry, this can be very therapeutic. It is evidence of a release of emotion, not of weakness; you will hopefully feel a lot better afterwards.



Some men worry that their experience will not count as sexual assault if they got an erection or ejaculated. This does not mean you enjoyed it. Sexual arousal is not the same as consent. This is your body’s natural experience to stimulation and will happen regardless of the circumstances.



In addition, sexual assault is just as serious regardless of the gender of the perpetrator. If anyone says no and the perpetrator does not stop, it is abuse. There are no grey areas. Although this form of abuse is not legally defined as rape, if that is how you feel most comfortable defining it - do so. You are free to define and come to terms with it as you wish, the legal definitions in these situations are often restrictive and carry an inherent bias and assumptions which are not true.



A positive frame of mind is important, and the knowledge that there are people out there who can help you.




 YOU are worthy of help.





The experiences of men who have been sexually assaulted or raped are often very different from those of women. Nevertheless, they must never be belittled as less valid, sexual assault is unforgivable - whatever the circumstances.


Often men are even worse affected by the societal expectation to be strong. This can manifest itself in feelings of shame, worries that they should have been stronger, or should have fought back more. Try not to let these worry you, a survivor does what he must to survive, and sometimes fighting back could result in even more pain and injury.


It is also common for men to avoid seeking help for fear of ridicule, or of looking weak. This will not happen - recognising that you need help and looking for it, if you feel able, is not sign of weakness. There is considerably more acceptance and understanding nowadays, along with police officers specially trained to provide support to male survivors. You can also find many dedicated male support services, you owe it to yourself to get as much help as you can, there are people that can help you heal.